I don’t think I will always do this, and there are certain moments when the phone definitely needs to be turned off, but while my kids are still pre-college, I’m at least going to make sure there is no emergency. But then there are my boundaries with both my kids and my ex that I have to enforce as well. But when the text dings and it is, in fact, one of my kids … Let’s take this from the perspective of a first date, rather than a developing relationship.
From that point on, please treat it as an unexpected emergency. But if you’re avoiding the confrontation because “his kids need him all the time,” that might be the issue right there.
There are plenty of single parents who use their kids to get out of almost every obligation. exercise, dating, taking responsibility for their own actions.
And I have been the dad who apologized for checking his phone when a text dinged while on a date.
It really helps that it's anonymous because I got comments from friends that they would not say to my face. He gets his children every other weekend and on those weekends, I don't see him nor am I invited to do things with them.
Personally, I have found this website very helpful because it helped me easily get anonymous feedback from friends about my relationship. I'm head over heels, but recently I've wondered myself if I am getting what I need from this relationship.